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Thursday, July 25, 2013

Send me on my way...




So, I've been thinking about this blog post all week, as I have been pounding out the miles around our neighborhood.  I've been thinking about creating this blog.  I've been thankful that I was out there, walking, rather than sitting here, struggling to put this all into words.

It is not easy carrying around a lot of extra weight.  It is not easy on the joints, on the spine, on the heart, on the lungs... not to mention easy on the emotions.  I am obese.  For each and every doctor appointment for the past few years, that word has been written down somewhere on my report.  I am addressing the social stigma of that word, not the wide array of bodies that may fall in the obese category.  I don't look at people and think "obese", "skinny", "just right...", because who am I to judge?  I just see people - I don't care what they look like.

What I do see is people judging me.  Not all, but some.  They are not people I know, but people in passing.  I'm sure that some of it is in my head, but sometimes it's not.  I am an introvert, so I prefer very much to be in the background, not being judged.

I am putting myself out there, over-sharing as usual, as a way to reach out to anyone else who can relate.  I am a SAHM, with four kids.  I don't have a gym membership.  I don't run (I'll explain why, later).  I am a procrastinator.  I've come up with every excuse over the past seven years when it comes to getting some exercise.  You'll find me on the bench at the park.  I'm an emotional eater.  I've hung on to every favorite piece of smaller-sized clothing over the years, thinking, "Someday..."

Well, I'm here.  I'm here at 'someday'.  I've got some good tunes and mediocre walking shoes.  Enough sitting!  I'm going for a walk...


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